.Publisher's Keep in mind: The observing is the text of a letter from Exploration 3 Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), reviewing the occasions of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't written very much about specifics of the objective during the month I have actually been here, mainly for pair of reasons: the first being actually that there has been extremely little bit of opportunity to do that sort of writing, and second of all given that I'm not sure how comfy I am actually discussing thoughts I provide friends and family with the rest of the globe.Effectively, clearly the planet transformed today. What I say or do is actually very slight reviewed to the value of what took place to our nation today when it was actually assaulted by ... by whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we understand, I suspect. Hard to recognize at whom to guide our rage and fear ...I had only ended up a number of duties today, the absolute most taxing being actually the physical exams of all team participants. In a personal conversation adhering to that, the tour surgeon informed me they were possessing a quite poor time on the ground. I possessed no concept ...He described the scenario to me as ideal he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually flabbergasted, then horrified. My initial idea was actually that this had not been a genuine talk, that I was actually still listening to among my Tom Clancy tapes. It merely really did not seem to be achievable on this scale in our nation. I could not even picture the particulars, also before the headlines of further destruction began being available in.Vladimir visited rather quickly, picking up that one thing incredibly serious was actually being talked about. I swayed Michael right into the element as well. They were additionally blown away and also stunned. After our experts signed off, I made an effort to explain to Vladimir as well as Michael as best I could possibly the prospective immensity of the act of fear in midtown New york as well as at the Pentagon. They accurately knew and were extremely supportive.I eyed the World Chart on the computer system to find where over the globe our team were actually and discovered that our team were coming southeast out of Canada as well as would certainly be skipping New England in a handful of minutes. I whized around the station until I discovered a window that will provide me a sight of NYC and got hold of the nearby camera. It took place to be a camera, and I was actually appearing south coming from the home window of Michael's cabin.The smoke seemed to have an odd bloom to it at the foundation of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the city. After going through some of the news articles we simply acquired, I think our experts were actually considering NY around the moment of, or even quickly after, the failure of the 2nd high rise. Exactly how dreadful ...I panned the electronic camera during the East Shore to the south to find if I could possibly observe every other smoke around Washington, or even anywhere else, however nothing showed up.It was quite difficult to consider job after that, though we possessed some to carry out, yet on the upcoming orbit we crossed the US additional south. All three of us were actually functioning one or two video cameras to try to get scenery of New york city or Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, however no details source can be found. It all looked awesome coming from two to three hundred miles away. I can not visualize the heartbreaking scenes on the ground.Other than the psychological effect of our nation being actually dealt with and thousands of our residents and also perhaps some pals being actually gotten rid of, the most difficult sensation being actually where I am is one of solitude.Following day ... I suspect the exhaustion and also emotional stress acquired the best of me. I could not stay awake as well as continue to create. Today was actually still tough, but our experts began receiving additional details, plus our experts had the honor of speaking straight with the Center Director, Roy Estess, who guaranteed us that the ground staffs would certainly continue to function and also guarantee our safety, along with the safe function of the Place. Our team additionally heard from our Supervisor, Mr. Goldin, who incorporated that the partners in the Program are all totally devoted to proceeding safe procedures and support. These were never questions for me. I recognize all these people! The ground teams have been very supportive, incredibly understanding of the influence of the headlines, as well as have tried to be as practical as feasible. They have all been actually really qualified and centered though I can't visualize the disturbance of this particular sort of headlines can be found in and the idea that federal government buildings could be vulnerable. They never bypassed a beat, also when moving nerve center. As well as a team of senior personnel as well as good friends gave our company a quite detailed instruction about what was recognized as well as what was actually being actually carried out in the authorities as well as at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was quite practical and also type of all of them to perform in the midst of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has likewise been encouraging and also useful, attempting to uplink newspaper article when our own resources were inoperable, and pointing out kind words ...My crewmates have been actually great, also. They recognize it's been actually a difficult time for me and the folks on the ground, and also they've made an effort to become as also keeled as well as valuable as achievable. Michael even fixed me my preferred Borscht soup for dinner. As well as they give me plenty of area to assume when I required it. They are extremely thoughtful as well as of course shocked at whoever would do this.I know plenty of folks in Washington, many folks who travel to DC as well as NYC, plenty of who are actually captains, that I felt certain I will get a minimum of a couple of pieces of bad news over the following couple of times. I acquired the first one today when I learned that the Leader of the American Airlines jet that reached the Government was Chic Burlingame, a classmate of mine. I met Chic throughout plebe summer months when our team were in the D&B all together, and our company possessed considerable amounts of courses with each other. I can not visualize what he must of experienced, and also now I listen to that he might possess risen further than our experts can easily even think of by potentially preventing his aircraft coming from being the one to attack the White Residence. What a horrible reduction, yet I make sure Chic was dealing with bravely throughout. As well as tears don't flow the very same in space ...It's hard to describe just how it feels to be the only United States entirely off the planet each time like this. The sensation that I ought to be there with each of you, dealing with this, aiding in some way, is actually frustrating. I understand that our company perform the threshold (or even beyond) of a terrible change in the past of the world. A lot of traits are going to certainly never be the same once again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not merely for the manies thousand as well as hundreds of individuals straight influenced by these horrendous actions of terrorism, however perhaps for we all. Our experts will definitely discover ourselves really feeling differently about dozens of points, consisting of perhaps room exploration, unfortunately.It's terrible to see smoke cigarettes pouring from injuries in your own country coming from such an awesome perspective. The duality of performing a spacecraft devoted to enhancing daily life on the planet and also checking out lifestyle being destroyed by such willful, awful actions is jolting to the subconscious, no matter who you are. And the expertise that every little thing will be actually different than when our experts launched by the time our experts land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our country and also in our leadership that our company are going to carry out every thing achievable to better shield her and also our loved ones, and also to deliver justice of what has been done. I possess self-confidence that the really good individuals at NASA will certainly perform whatever important to proceed our objective securely as well as return our team safely and securely at the correct time. And also I miss out on each one of you quite. I can't be there with you face to face, and our team have a very long way to go to accomplish our purpose, however be actually certain that my heart is actually with you, and recognize you reside in my prayers.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the last letter ... The good news is, it's been a busy full week up below. As well as to confirm that, like our country, our experts are actually advancing our intended course along with organization as usual (as high as achievable). Tonight the current enhancement to the station, the Russian Docking Chamber will be actually launched from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday night (US opportunity), it will certainly dock along with us, at a port never utilized before on the nadir edge of the Service Component. This new module will offer our company one more place to dock a Progression or even Soyuz and also will definitely offer a huge airlock with two able to be used hatches for conducting EVA's in Russian Orlan fits, which our company are going to do a few of before our company come home.The issue just before in dealing with today was inadequate headlines. The complication now is actually way too much. It came simultaneously when email was actually repaired, and also there's not enough time to read it all! Plus it's as well challenging to manage all of it instantly. However I cherish receiving it, and I definitely value the wonderful letters of support and also relationship I am getting.We are prospering aboard, obtaining our work performed, as well as discussing factors. Final night our experts had a long dialogue over dinner regarding the implication of these events, the achievable activities to observe, and what ought to be actually carried out. After supper, Michael resolved telling me that every e-mail he received coming from pals in Russia pointed out exclusively to tell me how regretful they were that this taken place, stretching their acknowledgements, and also talking to exactly how I was actually carrying out. Vladimir instructed me the Russian phrase for "acknowledgements" after talking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian and the English words are a lot too long to articulate effortlessly.) Really type folks.For the last two times, the Russian MCC has been good enough to transfer real-time programs of broadcast news regarding the occasion and also associated tales, to make certain I was actually properly informed. Every expert who has started free throw line to talk about a technique or a complication has at some factor expanded greetings to me with kind phrases. Tonight the Russian capcom informed our company that as a result of the big day of recognition in the United States, all the time individuals had actually been carrying florals as well as lining all the wall surfaces of the United States consular office in Moscow, as well as this evening they were actually lighting candles in the street outside the consular office. Exactly how the world has actually modified.People all over seem to acknowledge the senselessness and also terror in this particular assault. As well as the tremendous reduction. Moscow has managed these type of issues in the last few years with house and metro bombings, so they are actually as restless to do away with this threat as we are actually. However all-time low product line is that there are actually great people just about everywhere that would like to reside in peace. I go through that a youngster asked, "America is thus excellent to various other countries, our experts always aid everybody, how can they detest our company a lot?".I hope the example of teamwork as well as leave that this space probe and all the people in the program illustrate daily will sooner or later inspire the remainder of the world to operate similarly. They must!However, our company will not be taking flight over the US during the time people are actually lighting candle lights. Don't recognize if our team might view that anyway. Our experts carried out, nevertheless, observe a quite unique and also attractive attraction a handful of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz booster. Our team were eclipsing it as well as it came into view regarding 3 moments after its launch coming from Baikonur as the sun hit our terminal, so it was actually still at night. It appeared like a big comet with a directly, broad rear silhouetted against the dark earth under. Even with some negative lights for a while as the sun hit our home window at a low viewpoint, I took care of some online video of it as first our company passed the spacecraft, and after that watched it start to mesmerize as it obtained altitude and rate. I shot until main engine cutoff as well as enhancer separation occurred just as our experts came close to sunrise on the Himalayas. An unforgettable view in an unforgettable week ...Life goes on, also precede. Our team are actually here to stay ... Frank.